Webomator: Bradley W. Schenck's blog
Bradley W. Schenck's books Webomator Blog Topics Archives Retro Sci Fi
Search retro robot art
Subscribe RSS retro future Bradley W. Schenck at Facebook Bradley W. Schenck at Goodreads Bradley W. Schenck on Twitter Bradley W. Schenck at DeviantArt Bradley W. Schenck Also by Bradley W. Schenck I play games.
Thrilling Tales: The Toaster With TWO BRAINS

Filed under Thrilling Tales of the Downright Unusual, Works in Progress

Toaster with TWO BRAINS pulp illustration

Here’s a retro science fiction pulp magazine cover for a magazine that doesn’t exist, but probably ought to: THRILLING TALES OF THE DOWNRIGHT UNUSUAL.

In this imaginary issue we have that nail-biting page turner “The Toaster with TWO BRAINS”, in which our heroes delve deep into the hostile lair of Doctor Rognvald, beneath the volcanoes of Iceland – only to discover that this evil genius has created the ultimate malevolent kitchen appliance: the Toaster with TWO BRAINS! Is it unstoppable? Immovable? Relentless? Horrifying? Unkillable? You bet it is.

Because a toaster with one brain isn’t terrifying. But two? Talk about the heebie-jeebies!

If I were able to explain this…. I wouldn’t. You can wonder all you like about infant toaster traumas. I’m not talking. Except to observe, as is my habit, that I cooked this thing up to serve fresh to you, dear reader, as an archival print, a poster, stylish t-shirt, greeting card, and coffee mug – just the thing for that apocalyptic breakfast that the toaster has in mind for us all.

 
 
2 responses to “Thrilling Tales: The Toaster With TWO BRAINS
jean says:
June 18th, 2008 at 6:36 am

Not talking about childhood toaster traumas, eh? Then one can’t help but ask: Are these GOAT brains?

Bradley W. Schenck says:
June 18th, 2008 at 10:38 am

Oh… if I were a couple of thousand miles closer and I had a bowl of guacamole in my hand… you would be in SO much trouble…!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

webomator
The Webomator Blog is powered by WordPress.
Down in the Basement. Where it Strains Against its Chains and Turns a Gigantic Wheel of Pain, for all Eternity. Muahahahahaha.